Comic Series
Sundry Comix
Da Boids
Nora Talbot
Larry Lagoon's
Fanzine Blues
Larry Lagoon's
Comic Dreams
Larry Lagoon's
Funny Pages
Suzy
by Richard O'Brien &
Bob Vojtko
Low Budget Funnies
by Bob Vojtko
And so concludes the run of Smart-Ass Simpson comic strips that originally appeared in the TBG Funnies pages of The Buyer's Guide in 1980. I had long since forgotten where the story went from here, but fortunately I found the original story outline so here for the first time is a synopsis:
When Simpson and Coral step inside the police station they see it's filled with babies. The police chief tells them he's been receiving reports of meteorite strikes all over the city. Simpson explains they aren't meteors, they're spacepods. Each one contains an alien baby from out of space. But why are they all gathering at police headquarters?
While the chief and his officers are up to their elbows in diapers, Simpson and Coral take off to find Simpson's old friend Professor Gearbox. The Professor is well aware of the invading spacepods. He's been watching them as they approach Earth through an enormous telescope and has traced them back to the planet Mars.
Back at the police station, the babies reveal their powers and turn their hypnovision on the unsuspecting police. In moments the entire police force is completely under their control. The officers are ordered to find Simpson and his assistant, Coral. The detective must be stopped.
By now Professor Gearbox has unveiled a small, homemade spaceship. He's ready to take the fight against the invaders to their homeworld. Simpson agrees to join him while Coral tracks another incoming meteorite through the Professor's telescope.
When Simpson and the Professor blast off for Mars, Coral sets out to retrieve the meteor which has landed in a lake. When she arrives on site, she finds a row boat and paddles over to the approximate spot where she saw the meteor land. She uses a fishing pole to hook the meteor and is able to bring it aboard. Using a fish club she breaks open the spacepod to reveal it's contents. This time the alien inside isn't moving. As she explores further she realizes the aliens aren't babies at all—they're robots!
Meanwhile the leader of the robo-babies and several police officers have reached the Simpson Detective Agency and ransacked the office. They spot a photograph of Professor Gearbox on the wall and locate his address in a rolodex.
By this time Coral has returned to the Professor's lab to contact Simpson and relay the news that the babies are actually robots. While still in radio communication, the robo-baby strike force arrives. Coral is captured and the leader turns his hypnovision on her as Simpson and the Professor helplessly listen in.
Out in space, another meteor is spotted just outside the Professor's spaceship. Using the ships grappling arms they capture the meteor and once they have it inside the spacecraft, they break it open. The Professor immediately neutralizes the robot inside and taps into it's memory program using a sophisticated computer link that reveals everything. The robots are the precursor to an invasion force from Mars orchestrated by their leader, an alien Martian named Dr. Calum.
Professor Gearbox and Smart-Ass Simpson contact Dr. Calum via their interplanetary radio and tell him they're onto him and they'll soon put an end to his vile plans. Then they set course for Earth to stop the robo-babies.
When they arrive back on good 'ol Earth, they emerge from their spacecraft disguised as robo-babies and infiltrate the enemy ranks. Unfortunately the ruse fails and they're captured at police headquarters. Given the hypnovision treatment, our heroes fall under the control of Calum's army of robo-babies. It seems all is lost.
But suddenly the lower half of Simpson's body—the smart-ass—separates from his torso and attacks the robo-babies. He soon destroys the main mind-control console and everyone under Dr. Calum's control is freed. The army of robo-babies is quickly defeated while Simpson rejoins his smart-ass.
Dr. Calum has been thwarted, but vows in his final communication with Professor Gearbox, that the Earth hasn't seen the last of him.
The End
Below is the earliest Smart-Ass Simpson comic I can recall. It was drawn in 1973. The color was added using colored contact films which were placed over the artwork and cut out with an X-Acto knife.
The above Smart-Ass Simpson comic originally appeared in the first issue of Funny Paper in 1978. It appeared right after the letters page, hence the letters reference in the first panel.
The gag for this strip was no doubt inspired by many years of watching Bugs Bunny, Tom & Jerry, and Road Runner cartoons. Those characters were constantly being blown up or otherwise obliterated and miraculously appeared in the next scene entirely unscathed.
Dave McDonnell wrote his Media Report column for The Buyer's Guide for five years. He left it shortly after he began working as an Assistant Editor for Steranko's Mediascene Preview. He started working on his column, Coming Attractions, in issue #42.
To continue his support for Alan Light's weekly adzine, McDonnell created TBG Funnies, a collection of comic strips created by many of the fan artists and cartoonists who contributed to his earlier column. TBG Funnies debuted in 1980, most likely in August or September, but I'm uncertain of the exact issue.
The first installment of TBG Funnies included Bill by Chad Draper, Tim Fuller's Media-Toons, The Origin of Baby Hitler by John Sayers, Fanman by Inter-Fan, and Rich Bruning's Marvelous Fruits 'N' Veggies.
My strip, Smart-Ass Simpson began soon, perhaps as early as the second installment. For me, TBG Funnies was one of the The Buyer's Guide's best features. Other contributors included Bill Coleman, John Cosgriff & Chris Ecker, Mark Der Marderosian, Randy Elliott, Ken Hahn, Garry Hardman, Brian Hayes, David Heath, John Howard, George Kochell, Sheldon Oppenberg, Rick Stoner, Fred Hembeck, Andy Kamm, Michael Lail, Duane Hanson, Charles T. Smith, and Bob Laughlin.
My run in TBG Funnies lasted 19 issues. The character Smart-Ass Simpson (see early comix at the bottom of this page) was recast as a detective for what ended up being an unfinished series. Each comic strip was both a self-contained gag and part of a continuing story. Although the story ends abruptly, a detailed synopsis of the story appears after the final comix.